Dear Die-ary...

Today, as many people were dreading, including myself and Nikki, was the skool Gym and Dance competition. As my dad has said, girls were put on this earth soley to dance and scream. His prophesies were justified today.

This Gym and Dance crap was just an excuse every year for bunking off of lessons. Next year I'll have to go to classes and not go watch, unless if I were to take part myself. But for years 8-10, we get to watch. They were trying to diminish our souls while still very young. What happens is that there's some random music that the performer(s) bring along, and they dance to it or do a gym display to it. I choose not to partake in this dreadful event, but seeing as I was still young enough to have my soul diminished, I had to watch.

As I did last year, and probably the year before that, I ignored the first half. Well, except Sophie, Jenni, and Nikki's display. Of course. It was "Holding out for a hero" - Gym display. Nikki might be either blushing, cowering, or screaming at the computer as I go on... Nikki was flipped around by the other two, as she's the smallest (mwaa-haa-haa-haa). And I have to say, even though this might sound so very offensive, though I mean it not to be, Nikki did things that I never expected her to do. That is, gym-wise. Cartwheels and stuff. I forget. There was one accident that people 'claim' to not have noticed. Jenni was meant to go into a handstand, then go over, stand up, go into a handstand again, go over again, then stand up again. However, on the second handstand position she just hovered there... and hovered... and hovered... she was not moving, apart from swaying a bit. She couldn't go over! So she just went back down the same way she went again. But I have to say, it was cool, because in all the other displays it's the same thing over and over again... they flip over, everyone screams in their wolf-like way, as if there mind just became a blank on what happened 2 seconds ago.

BUT as I was saying, I ignored *most* of the first half. Jonesy had dragged me into the middle of a row of seats, despite the constant warning of, "I have to go to a music lesson soon," coming from me. So when it was time to go, I shouted, "3...2...1... GO GO GO GO GO," and barged through the stretched out legs of the impatient-for-their-'friends'-to-show-up plastics. I staggered out of the door, and went to play cello instead.

When I got out of the cello lesson, I didn't know what to do next. Should I go back and have my eardrums blasted? Or go around skool, and get into trouble? At first I walked around, to see if any classrooms were free. However, the only good free classroom had the skool engineer in there (it has computersssssssss in it), and if I waited around, I could've got caught. So back I went into the hall. I managed to grab a seat in the back, when I slithered through the standing nobodies. The seat was perfect! There was a rather big gap of free seats on the side of me, so I could put my things there. And as I had no interest in the whole 'event', I drew a picture of Jem (from Teacher's pet hate, that is) taking over the world. And it's not finished. I also drew an unfinished collage of Vampeep characters' expressions. Mmm hmm, yeah.

Break came, and went. But as I got back to the hall, some dozy looking twits had sat on my belongings. I asked them to pass them over, and after a few cow-looking-at-an-oncoming-train looks, I finally got them, and grabbed a different seat, next to LP... er, I mean Fred, and behind Hannah and Jade. All the way through the next half, Hannah and Jade whispered to each other, and so all the way through I couldn't see, pray some heads. I got very intollerent when the greatest Dance 'entry' EVER (no offence, Nikki and Charlie! You would've won if they didn't enter! ...yeah, I sound like a plastic there.) was before me. It was some girls, whoever they are, dancing to Power Rangers. It was a mix of an advert, a song, and an episode. OK, first, they're lined up. The 'bad guy' comes on, mucks around for a bit, while in the recording some rubbish about them being unstoppable to the Power Rangers was being said. Bad guy goes, Power Rangers put their masks on. They dance around a bit, a few ballances here and there. Then they soon 'turn into' robots. Whee! I continued to repeat, "Go go Power Rangers!" to any innocent person. Needless to say, our Power Ranger friends won. However, no one else shared my passion (not the best word to use, but you try finding a better one!) for the display. Those Power Rangers kicked a$$. Haha.

Apart from the Power Rangers, today was a complete waste of time. Nikki, Sophie, and Jenni didn't win. Charlie was majorly stressed out that she didn't win for her dance. Girls screamed in my ears. At one point, I shouted out, "If you don't stop screaming like that, I'll be forced to tie a leash 'round your neck, and give you some dog biscuits!" ...hardly anyone heard. Oh and, at the end, we're always told, "Everyone's a winner!" Then they said, "Can the winners please perform again?" Oh dear God, we would've been there all night if everyone else was as observant as me.

I've also been thinking of performing next year. Dance, of course, as I'm even scared of doing forward rolls. Long story, involving me on a bouncy castle, and a fractured neck. Dances we could do... The llama song, Looking for my leopard, Mixes of songs from the Simpsons and Futurama, Crazy Frog Axel F... to annoy everyone (scarily enough, did you know you can dance the Macerina to Crazy Frog Axel F?), The Numa Numa song... to annoy everyone yet again, London underground (lots of swear words), and the Bill and Ben dance. ♪ Jump to the right and clap your hands, do a little wiggle where your two feet land, slide to the left, shout "Bill and Ben", put your hands on your head, we're the flowerpot men... ♪ And last year, we were thinking of dancing to the standard Nokia ringtone... Maybe we could do that!

...I don't think so some how.